Wouldn’t it be nice if all things mommy meant sunshine and rainbows and skittles pouring down during a midday rain. If everything always went perfectly as planned, and a small bump in the road meant that you left the house 5 minutes early instead of your normal 10 minutes early. I often get glimpses into the window of another mother’s life weather it be at the grocery store or an actual friend and I often think, “Wow, that women has it together”. Her life is perfect and some people really do live in the sunshine, rainbow and skittles type of life.  Let me just say, that isn’t me. Far from it.

S0 the other day I went shopping at Target with my son Liam. He had started with a cough earlier that day but wasn’t acting sick otherwise. I gave him a snack and started shopping. About 2 minutes into my Target fix, my son starts to cough. Left me preface this with the fact that Liam has a very sensitive gag reflex and for only being 21 months old, I’ve cleaned up more throw up and puke than I care to discuss. I bet you can see where this story is going. So as he is coughing he starts to gag and I can see it happening. He is going to throw up right here, right now.

What do you think I do? Do I pick him up and let him aim for the floor? No. Do I try and grab something or anything out of this diaper bag to help with the inevitable mess? No. I do the only logical thing to do which is try and catch the vomit. What?! Why. Why is that the first logical thing that comes to mind? I can’t explain it, but that was my plan.

Pardon this description, I know this story is not for someone with a sensitive stomach. So, I am left standing there with both hands full of vomit. I’m usually a woman with a plan and this left me motionless, speechless, and panicked. How the HELL was I going to do anything, or go anywhere without someone’s help. I had nowhere to discard of the mess I was now holding in my hands. So I did the only thing I could think of, I quietly called for Help! I probably stood there for a full 2 minutes before someone walked by. I asked for help, and the person directed me to the dressing room area where there would be napkins.

So here’s me trying to push the cart with my elbows while my hands are full of stomach contents, and Liam is starting to cry because I’m holding his throw up practically in his face. I finally manage to make it to the dressing rooms. I explained to the lovely lady what had happened and she quickly got me a garbage can to discard of the mess. I was so MORTIFIED! How can a Target trip go so wrong? Luckily the lady said, “Don’t worry, I totally understand. I am a mother too.” It was one of those moments where I was so thankful for the camaraderie of another mother. It could have been a teenager that was completely grossed out that would be left dry heaving in the corner. I may have left this other mother that way as well, but she never let me feel that way.

So after all this, I went and got Liam cleaned up in the bathroom, changed his outfit (which luckily I still carry a spare), and I continued my shopping trip. You think I would leave right, because my son was sick? Nope, I had things to do, shopping to complete and this was NOT going to stop me. I did make it a quick trip however, and picked up a starbucks and candy bar on the way out because after all of that, it seemed like the only thing that was going to help me recover from that traumatic experience. Liam of course was fine and still asking for snacks two minutes after he was cleaned up.

So I might be stretching it here by saying that there is a morel to every story, even this one. Motherhood is not alway rainbows, and sunshine, and skittles.  Everyone has days like this. They just happen.  Although it would be nice to get a warning like “Barb, today you are going to be tested, be prepared”. Okay,okay I know that is too much to ask. Good news, is that we have recovered from the traumatic target event and I am now able to look back at this and laugh. It is funny, REALLY funny, so it is okay if you laugh too.

Thats all friends, just a funny story and a good laugh about my experience with the messy side of motherhood.

Anybody else have any good stories like this? I’d love to hear them! Please share!

~Barb